just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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