should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
