at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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