Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
