he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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