"it" just moved
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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