He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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