You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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