Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
