we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
