you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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