ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize