It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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