stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
His hands were made for my vagina.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Randomize
