this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Girls should come with a carfax report
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
