My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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