I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
