Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize