Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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