It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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