i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
