Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
