Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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