And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
