Are we in a gay sports bar?
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
That's when you crack a 10am beer
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
