Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
