you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
