what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I'm getting married
To pizza
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
