i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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