I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
