Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
