I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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