you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
