Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
