Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
