wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
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