Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
