Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
