There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
