just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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