Can Purell be used as lube?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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