closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
