I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
