I need to stop coming to work sober
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
home. puking in laundry basket.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Randomize
