batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize