apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
