What a fucking waste of an outfit
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize