does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
