I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
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