i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
