Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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